You Against Yourself, and Me Against the Whole World

According to Paolo Coelho, “And when you want something, all the universe conspires you to achieve it.”

 

This is such very encouraging words from the novel “The Alchemist”, which I think pushes me to yearn for something and make it happen. But in this life, trials and sufferings are always part of it.

 

Him and His Guilt

He said he needs to do something and if he doesn’t do it, he will ruin everything. His guilt feeling over falling for other girl really gave him tons of heart stubbing shame of coming back to me…All I know, he is still giving me a lot of reasons to stay and hold on.

 

Me and My Friends

I guess it is a universal reaction from close friends to get really angry to their friend’s ex-boyfriends who cheated on her. It is a common expression for them to say: “You don’t deserve him! You’ll soon find the right guy.” It did make me feel better for a while but I guess that is not the answer. I am really thankful that I have them through thick and thin. It is very nice to know that there are people who are really there when you need them, even when you don’t.

 

Me and My Family

Just this morning, I heard my sister and Tatay were talking about me not being open about my current love life situation. I even overheard that I was not coming to work because of that. My mind is shouting: “Excuse me….those were official leaves!”. But then again, I can’t blame them to have these kinds of opinion about what is happening on me because I don’t gave them the real story. As I’ve said on my previous blog, I am not yet ready to tell them the truth because I am afraid they might do something about it.

 

Me and Everyone Else

It really upsets me every time the broker of the house texts me and asking when will she going to get the documents needed for the processing of the loan. But it even upsets me twice whenever the deacon asks if he has attended the worship service every Thursdays and Sundays. Everybody is asking me how he is doing in his new work in the city... "oh, please stop it"...

 

Me and Myself

This is a new experience to me and the things that I just learned were never taught in school or even by my family. I was not prepared but I know deep inside my heart that there’s a sun after the storm.

 

I am jut pretending to be brave, that I can handle everything. But the very truth is, I am just waiting for Mr. V to come back. That’s the shocking truth and I don’t know if it is the right thing to do.

 

 

Why on earth I am blogging about this even I have told myself that I already moved on?

 

 

BettyB's Birthday

Start:	Dec 6, '07
Location:	London, United Kingdom

BettyB is my own shorten version of "Ms. Boop", an older sister. She's 26000 miles away from us (London). She'll be turning 40 on this day *joke* 30+ lang :D

Mr. V's Birthday

Start:	Dec 1, '07
Location:	Ilocos Norte

He's turning 27! He's celebrating his birthday at his hometown in Ilocos Norte.

I Ended the Week With Laziness Too Z z z z

I didn’t sleep well last night. I suddenly woke up at around 2:30 in the morning because of the heavy rain. I tried to sleep again but the sound of the rain was too loud for me to get some more serene sleep.

 

Then I texted someone whose suppose to call me the night before. It was not that I expected it too much but someone has to be more careful in telling promises. It was not really normal for him to forget something like that, though.

 

I got some real sleep at around 3:30am I guess, then Tatay woke me up at 5:00am. I forgot to tell him that I will not go to work today. But since the breakfast was already on the table, I joined him for breakfast. The rain was still pouring and according to Kuya Kim of “Umagang Kay Ganda”, the rain was due to Monzoon winds. He also mentioned something about Fujiwhara effect, for an instance, with two storms some 900 miles apart, the stronger typhoon (Mina, in this case), will pull or suck the weaker (Lando). Well, goodbye Mina and Lando, I think Nonoy is next coming. (Hehehe, parang casts sa telenovela no?

 

Since, I did not come to work; I sent email to (Information Systems)IS Team for their tasks. Not that I don’t trust my Team if they're doing their assigned tasks without me supervising them, but it will be their guide for this day.

So, go IS!

 

By the way, I am currently reading "Veronica Decides To Die" by Paolo Coelho while I am waiting for Sophie's World from a friend. I'll do a review about this maybe next week.

 

The Last Things

Last place you...

Ate something

Dining area at breakfast this morning.

 

Hugged someone

Inside a car, while saying goodblye to someone.

 

Did your homework

On my desk

 

Broke the law

Jaywalking going to SM Bacoor

 

Bought clothes

SM Bacoor

 

Watched TV

Inside my room

 

 

Last thing you...

Bought at a fast food place

Chicken Meal at Jollibee

 

Touched

My keyboad

 

Drank

Coffee

 

Ate

Arrozcaldo

 

Smoked

NA

 

Said (out loud)

Maam Trix! (she's with her headphones on)

 

You plugged in

Cellphone charger last night

 

 

Others

Last number you dialed

09183453813 Ate Mira's cellphone number

 

Color of the last thing you bought

Green Guava

 

Last person you yelled at

Jelly

 

Last person you kissed

Marc

 

 

http://www.pimpsurveys.com/view-survey.php?id=47

How About My Real Wish List?

I have here my so-called ‘Heart-Felt Wish List for 2008’

 

-          Happiness

My life has been in a roller coaster starting the year 2006. Although my career is quite okay, I did try my luck abroad. I thought after my UK trip, I will be happy. I was happy indeed but everything seemed to change.

 

-          A Well-Cared Family of My Own

I am not getting any younger. When I was in college, I have set to myself that I’ll be getting married at the age 27. But it is already few weeks from now before the year ends and here I am, trying to recover from a tragic ending of my five-year romance.

 

-          Love

You never know what you have got until it is gone…

 

 

-          Be a Better Best Friend

This is somehow related to the lines above. I honestly can’t tell you how bad of a friend I was to my best friend. I really want to change this and have a brand new start.

 

Wish-A-Wish-A-Wish-A-Wish-Wish-Wish!

Here is my so-called ‘Early Earthly Wish List for 2008’:

 

 

Number 10: Pony Tails

My hair is growing so fast. I just want some change. Lagi lang kasing nakaladlad ang hair ko everyday sa office.

 

Number 9: Panties

Since I lost more than 17 lbs. this year, all my large-size panties are not too sexy for me anymore. Medium/Small size na lang ako ngayon.

 

Number 8: Stilettos, Sandals & Sleepers

All my favorite shoes are still in my super-delayed-balikbayan box from UK. Dith, kelan mo ba ito ipapadala? Hehehe. So this year, while waiting for my box, I would like to start building my shoes palace!

 

Number 7: Bed Sheet Set

I love bed sheets! I want an orange-shaded bed sheet (tamang tama para sa Tiger design) for my queen size bed.

 

Number 6: Sophie’s World by Jostein Gaarder

I just finished “The Alchemist – by Paolo Coelho” last night. The book is very inspiring. My next target is Sophie’s World.

 

Number 5: Skinny Pants, White Pants

Small Size, please. 26in *naks*

 

Number 4: Sweat Shirt (green, purple or red)

I saw a nice green stripes sweat shirt from kamiseta. That inspired me. I might use it on our year-end party on December 20.

 

Number 3: PLDT My DSL Connection

I am currently using prepaid internet cards/vibe which costs me at around P1,300.00 per month. Why not upgrade to DSL, dba?

 

Number 2: iPod Touch

Okay, I want to have this as a gift from other person. Hehehe.

 

Number 1: Desktop Computer

I love my 7-year old laptop but I want a more stable personal computer which I can play my ever favorite SIMS 2 game. *wink*

 

I Started The Week With Laziness Z z z z

It is Monday today and I am Home. Yes, I am here at home instead of doing all my pending office jobs from last week. I woke up this morning at around 5:30am (my alarm during weekdays) and I just felt that I was not in the mood to go to work. But wait; before someone calls me a slacker, we had this offsetting scheme at the office that if I happen to have accumulated extension hours, I can use it as official leave. I have been in the office working for the last four consecutive Saturdays that is why I can use it as official leave!

 

When I woke up and finally decided not to be productive today, I put a message on top of the rice cooker (so there was no way for Tatay to miss out my note) saying, “Tay, Hindi po ako papasok today, meeyeow”. If I didn’t inform him about that, he will prepare everything for me just as he does every morning.

 

• Buy pandesal for our breakfast (sometimes with pansit or champurado)
• Cook rice and prepare lunch meal (Because I am now enjoying eating packed lunch with Flooney, Raed,  Neilandrei and Prue. We just started two weeks ago)
• Boil water for our coffee and hot water for my bath
• Shine my shoes
• And wait for me on the table so that he can make his morning “sermons” for me

 

Tatay has been very supportive to me especially after he learned that Marc and I broke up. His “sermons” were always about heartaches and trial s in life, which I find very timely for me. He’s the one always talking and talking and then I was the one just listening and eating. I don’t speak up to him that much. That’s why he told me that family is always there to help you in good times and in bad times…

 

After I put the note, I got back to sleep and woke up at around 9:00 am. Before I got out from the bed, I texted Muriyama and Prue informing that I was not coming to office. Then I went out of the room and ate the pansit and suman on the table while I saw Tatay gardening outside. After my breakfast, I washed the dishes and I got motivated to clean the counters and the bath room. I remembered that I bought a scrub and Domex for that purpose. While I was in the middle of my cleaning sessions, I suddenly dropped the pail I was using, I screamed and the pail broke. My sister (Sis Doll) rushed in and asked what happened. She saw the broken pail and asked me silly questions again (like yesterday):

 

Sis Doll: Hindi ka din pumasok?

Meeyeow: Diba pumasok ako nung Saturday? Offset ako ngayon.

Sis Doll: Ahh pareho pala tayo. Ba, himala naglilinis ka? May dadating bang bisita?

Meeyeow: Wala.

Sis Doll:  May bago ka na bang manliligaw? hehehehe

Meeyeow: Sira, wala.

Sis Doll: Hahaha! (nang aasar mode) Akala ko may bago ka nang manliligaw.

 

She left and was successful again in disturbing me. Hehehe.

After few more minues, Jaja came. (Sis Doll's youngest daughter)

 

Jaja: Tita, bakit hindi na napunta si Tito V dito?

Meeyeow: Eh kasi madami syang ginagawa eh. Busy sya.

 

Hay, like mother like daughter.

 

If we are M&M's, we'd look like this...

This is Mr. V and Me (M&M's) as  candy coated pieces of chocolate that melts in the mouth, not in the hands. :D I put Mr. V's ever distinctive downward eyes and look at the smile (so much him). I also put the blue sling bag and I let him wear a gray pair of snickers. For me, I am wearing blue slippers and with a red bag. Nevermind the flower on the right side. I don't know why it is there.

I chose the orange color for me because I want to change my personality now. According to http://www.crystal-cure.com/orange.html, orange is basically associated with the benign warmth of the sun. It encourages creativity and enthusiasm. To make some difference in this dark era of my life, I chose to be relieved from becoming too serious about my problems. Orange means thoughfulness and sincerity.

For Mr. V, I gave him blue color, well, i just want to match it with the bag. Hehehe :D. but seriously, when I see color blue, I remember him... and his brown eyes ofcourse!

If you want to create your own M&M figures, just go to their website: http://www.becomeanmm.com/

Me Answers Everything

Do you still talk to the first person who hurt you so badly?

Yes. Others might think of this as pointless but I have my own reasons to talk to him. I still consider him as my friend.

Have you ever seen your best friend naked?

Yes. You know who you are.

Are you obsessed with someone?

Yes. I am not normal anymore. Sorry.

What did you do last night?

I shopped till I dropped @SM last night. As in! I spent around P3,000.00 for new clothes. May gusto pa akong bilhin, pero sa next sweldo na lang. Nagreklamo ang talampakan ko kakalakad.

Name something that you would love to eat right now?

Japanese Corn with butter and salt. Yung super sweet. Yum Yum.

Did you get any compliments today?

None. Pang aasar pa kamo.

 

Who was the last two people to call you?

Hmm, let me check my call registers.

 

*Sir Van- he asked me to run some scripts for the FMS database last Friday.

 

*Christian- he asked for help him with in his dial up connection yesterday. He was confused between 101300 and 101800 dial up numbers.

Are you happy?

No. But I still smile and laugh. But I am not happy at all.

 

Are you moody?

Yes. It started after I went back from London. Ewan ko, parang nag inarte ako.

Last person you hung out with?

Joseph and Fred. Last Friday night, we were the last ones to go home from the office. Thanks Joseph for the ride!

Have you ever tried to get back with an ex?

Yes, I think it was fulfilling for me... the fact that I became the pride-less person after the longest time.

Are you friends with all your exes?

Yes. Isa lang naman sya.

Have you ever had a stalker?

None. Not that I know.

 

Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Not yet. Pero sana ma-experience ko someday.

Listening to music? What are you listening to?

Yup. I have this play list in WMP that I have been playing for quite some time now even when I am in the office. It is a collection of break up and moving on songs.

Name three things you did today:

• Went to church
• Organized my dresser
• Posted a blog

Last person you text messaged?

Mr.V, telling him about the December 16 thanksgiving schedule.

Future kids name?

• Aisha (pronounced daw as “A-yee-sha”). It was his choice.
• Ayanna (this is what I want)

What are you doing tomorrow?

I have a scheduled meeting with Mr. Shadow about the business analysis of PREPAID SYSTEM Version 2.0

What is your mood?

Right now, I want to be alone inside my beloved room. I locked the door (Sorry JellyPotpot, I cannot let you in today)

Is anyone jealous of you?

No.

Where were you 2 hours ago?

So that was around 12:00 noon….I was in the same place where I am right now.

Where were you 4 hours ago?

So that was around 10:00 in the morning….I was inside the church.

What does your hair look like right now?

Pulled back pony tail.

Is your hair naturally curly, straight, or nappy?

It is Naturally Straight. But I do have pictures when I was still in grade school that my hair was curly. Uso daw noon yung kinukulutan (using Pagoda hair styling solution).

What do you think about marriage?

Just early this year, I was always in my “marriage fantasying mode” most of the time. But after the break up, I realize that it is not as simple as I thought. Marriage means both of you have come to realize the value of sharing and forgiving for the rest of your life.

Any of your friends getting married?

From my close circle of friends, none… but I think an officemate of mine, Jertz (to her girlfriend, Ivy) they are getting married on December 22, 07.